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interdependence and apples


》　It really saddens me that it only takes one bad apple to ruin a bunch for most people.

The reason the saying is, "one bad apple ruins the bushel/barrel" is that because of the way apples rot, they emit a gas that causes all the apples around them to rot as well. When talking about how people interact, a person did not develop their personality by accident or by chance; they were enabled by so many people that there's almost no way of picking out any particular influence. For instance, if you read the book about Trump by his niece, she points out that nearly every troubling behavior he has was initially caused by the extremely high desire he had to earn his own father's affection, and was subsequently reinforced by celebrity-dom and the trappings of wealth. Similarly MLK Jr., who was a reverend for some time before he became a celebrity, was strongly influenced by his own understanding of the Word of God and the unconditional support of his loved ones, even when it became deadly to do so. We would not have had "I have a dream" if he had not had parents and a wife who adored him.

Every person you interact with changes you, you know. They present their experiences and teach you their beliefs. The more you hear a phrase repeated, the more likely you are to believe it - that is all done unconsciously. It's important that we constantly practice mindfulness - by this I mean take a conscious look at what we believe and make sure it's what we want to believe - Do our thoughts and beliefs pass the test of Socrates' sieve: are they true? Are they helpful? Are they necessary? Or are they kind?

And are the people you interact with regularly, the ones who have the most impact on your beliefs and on your mental health, your psyche, are they repeating things that build you up, strengthen your community, or are they spreading rumors and unkind words that have no real reference in your immediate circumstance? In other words, are your friends good apples or are they starting to rot? Are you enabling them, allowing the rot to spread, or are you strengthening your skills of integrity and honor by meeting their needs to head off the behaviors and directly confronting poor logic when it arises?

Addendum: In fact, the reason we don't often use barrels to keep apples anymore is because of that gas, that interdependence they have. And here another parallel to social relationships can be drawn - insular echo chambers often quickly become toxic. It's important to always keep some "fresh air" going by building new relationships with new people - reading books outside your comfort zone, writing new pen pals on Reddit (hey, that's me!) and studying foreign cultures are brilliant ways to keep your mind flexible and capable of recognizing logical flaws, not only in others but also in your own arguments.
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